He's back! That awful man. I'm glad I was out of the house when he arrived. Anna and I had gone to a protest meeting. Some friends of ours had applied for planning permission to open a 'Feminist Boutique' in Evesham, and the dinosaurs on the council had turned down the application.

We staged a protest outside the town hall. It was fun. Anna knocked a policeman's helmet off. She was arrested and began screaming for the Swedish consul. They released her with a caution.

My dear little boy has got his girlfriend (Monica, I think her name is) pregnant. What a shock. I always thought Sydney was gay.

Now, this puts me in a difficult position - ideologically speaking. I mean, to get a young, innocent girl pregnant is a typical male, chauvinistic act; symbolising the paternalistic power structure of our decadent society, and its brutalising of the femine sex.

On the other hand, he is my little boy, so naive and vulnerable, and probably taken advantage of by this scheming little slapper.

Perhaps I should speak to Anna. She is bi-sexual, and so has a finger in both pies - so to speak. She - rather bizarrely - describes herself as 'a lesbian in a woman's body'.

That stingy sod hasn't brought me back a present. Anyway, it would probably have been unsuitable. Honestly, he has no taste. I said that to him once and he replied 'Obviously not - I married you!'

I am going to hand over to Anna now. Please excuse her 'fractured tongue' - her English, I mean. There is nothing wrong with her tongue... I can tell you.

Stick together girls.

Georgina